I think I’m becoming a red-neck. No kidding.  For example… I love driving on the seasonal back roads – the muddier the better. I love demotion derby.  Hell, they’re just good fun!   I’m starting to learn about guns and I no longer flinch when I hear a shot going off. It has been happening around here all summer.   In fact,  I now wake to the sound of a 12 gauge every morning at 6:30, now that the duck hunters are using the blind next door.  I know my 12 gauge from a 22 and   I accept that squirrels are fair game (pun intended).    

I still can’t imagine anyone wanting to hurt Bambi – especially the adorable young fawn we see regularly around here with white dots on it’s back….. but I’m ok with shooting ducks for meat.  In fact, bonus points for anyone who takes down a Canada Geese or two. 

 I’m thinking now of getting my own gun.  Don’t tell anyone but …. I seek revenge.  I personally want to blow away a damn beaver who is chewing up my trees.  You don’t want to mess with my trees.  

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Are you familiar with Jeff Foxworthy?  He has a stand-up comedy act defining “You know you are a red-neck if….”  These redneck jokes actually do apply:

• If you ever cut your grass and found a car…(or two)
• If your other vehicle is a John Deere
• If you park on the grass
• If you ever urinated around the back of your garden shed  because it’s too much trouble to go into the house
• If you no longer wipe your feet every time you walk into the house
• If sticky fly strips hanging from the ceiling are just part of the decor
• If you get cleaned up to walk the dog and then change back into grubby clothes when you get home 

We’re get’in nuttier than a squirrel turd …………………..(that’s red-neck talk)